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Writer's pictureEmily O'Dea

My 2024, in my 40s, PostPandemic, Post-2-Babies, First Serious Weight Loss Journey, Open Diary

Part One: The Wake Up Call

Oh man, part of me does not want to talk about this subject at all. And, the other 60% of me knows the power of sharing a story. So, here I go leaning into major vulnerability because shero Brene Brown says so. I hope you find my sharing this helpful, thoughtful, inspiring or sometimes we need to hear a similar story to your own to feel less alone, less in struggle and can take a sigh or breath. I really do believe healthy looks different on every body. We just don't see each others insides, know our blood results or know how the function of our cores are on a day to day basis nor, should we but, I think you get my point. One person can do all the right things and die in their sleep young, or another can do all the "wrong" things and live well into their 90s. Who knows what our destinies are, there's no crystal ball, and there is mindfulness that reminds us to enjoy and savor the moment. Over the next year or so, I'll be taking moments of pause and quiet to share my weight story journey with you. Each of our stories, bodies, experiences, and health spans are unique; I hope there is something here for you. I hope you can give me space and grace to share the journey and not just tips that worked for me and allow me to share with you the small shifts in the mind, kitchen and movement.


For those that don't know me, I am a mama of two angels. And, like a chiche, I gained weight after the births of my children. After my first I didn't make it quite to pre-baby clothes but, I was so close!!! I gained a "normal" amount of weight during my first pregnancy. Back then I was still running on the body positivity approach post baby:

  1. Do I feel good in my clothes?

  2. Do I feel good and confident in about my body?

  3. I gave myself 2 years to "bounce back"

  4. Also, I acknowledged that the body post baby may be different like in the ribs, and hips. I housed a growing baby for Pete's sake

  5. My focus was heavily on pelvic floor and functional core. (Hello, I'm a Pilates instructor.)

Then, a pandemic occurred in 2020 on pretty much to the day of my two year mark after baby #1. I think most of us had the common experience of gaining 19 lbs to go along with our covid-19 fears and avoidance. So, kiss those pre-baby clothes goodbye and welcome to comfort food and eating feelings. Can any of us really be shamed and blamed for this time in our lives?


I began working again in at the start 2021. I was noticing clothes fitting better again with the movement of pacing the room, doing reps with the amazing studio folks, energy to have me workout at home to make them all sweat the next day. I didn't actively do anything different in the kitchen. If I felt a little out of balance I would open my Ayurveda cookbook and make sure I was cooking with the seasons... I honestly don't know my weight at this time because I never stepped on a scale until I was pregnant with my second. Which by the way, was a complete surprise! We had been trying for a few months, I added some Eastern Fertility foods in the mix (hey so many of them are good for perimenopause too, win win) and I thought: well my age is showing therefore let's get rid of all the baby stuff, the internet was right, Eastern medicine is wrong, yada yada... I had a bit of a spiral. Turns out: eastern medicine so right. But I digress. So back to my weight before pregnancy #2, seriously don't know it. Even then, this mom brain of mine doesn't remember or I block it out. I do remember being larger with #2. No gestational diabetes this time around. I was so dog tired with #2 though as I tried to keep up with #1. I do remember at her birth I was 185lbs.


Background Pause

  • Childhood I was always average weight. Never did sports or anything active regularly.

  • 20s I was average as well, I gained weight eating out socially all the time but during heartbreak I shed off weight and then some finding yoga around 29. I didn't have to actively put myself on a diet. Never subscribed to that idea. I listened to yoga's messages of "I'm enough" and how to love yourself. People would ask me if I was pregnant because I carry weight low belly.

  • 30s I was very active. Running. Yoga. Pilates. Barre. Hiking. Walking. Loved it! People would still ask me if I was pregnant.....

  • I would say in my 20s and 30s I was at my heaviest probably 140lbs (maybe) and lightest at 110lbs.

  • 40s has been real. Pandemic. Second baby. Periomenpause. Wake up call. Ring Ring. People have stopped asking if I'm pregnant.... Grey highlights stop that question which should be a whole other blog post...

Man, second time around with a new baby is so different, isn't it?! My daughters have a wonderful four year gap. That also means though, my first daughter had her routines already at preschool and ballet, and baby had to go with the flow. That she did. The lack of energy being an "older mom" is a thing. It was 100% my experience. This restful, restorative, slow down, it's okay not to do it all, woman (me) didn't have the energy to do aggressive workouts. And, there was pelvic floor. I spent so much time rehabbing after my first I was not going to waste all the great foundation I gave myself! And, I didn't. By taking it easy I could sneeze, cough, and importantly laugh without any leaks. Pretty early on too. But, at 18 months after baby was born I proudly went into my wellness check, super impressed they hid my weight from me, I was like, "yeah, I'm more than my weight! Body positivity movement is working! F yay" Then....... the conversation circled to my weight. How was a feeling? How's the weight loss going? What are you going to do differently to shed the weight? Did you breastfeed? (That topic is a dagger to my gut, wanted to, couldn't, the end.) Set up your environment for success. Blah, blah, blah.....

What the fuck? I was soooooooooooooooo upset, triggered, hurt, confused, sad and probably more. And, that's me being honest. Very honest. Numbers were not discussed at this appointment. I looked down at the after summary sheet and I was at 160lb. I mean that was a 25lb loss from birth of of baby #2 in 18 months...What? Now, I was frustrated as well.


The fiery, Aries, perfectionist that I am went to work.


Just a taste of what "weight loss" looks like when searched:


What I Think Weight Loss Should Look and Feel Like Below.

To feel nourished, supported, with others, and with the understanding there's a genetic makeup also at work. "...focusing instead on other markers of health—things like insulin resistance (which can predict diabetes risk), blood pressure, chronic pain, mental health, and quality of life." (From the Newsweek article found below in Resources)




Part Two: Time to Just Do It

Fall (Sept thru November)

The first week is the hardest. Between my disappointment, the overwhelm, the seeking to find support in the right places, the doubt, the sugar detox screaming... A new diet or a new healthy life style change can feel not great. I'm no stranger to this. I have done restrictive diets to manage pain and allergies (no soy, no diary, no gluten, no garlic), I have done the SIBO diet (oh, I have a special hatred for that one) for pain, I've had to watch carbs (manageable gestational diabetes during my first pregnancy, missed it by one point at the end but grateful for the eye opening experience), and I've done Whole Life and Whole 30 challenges. I've seen Ayurvedic practitioners and Naturopaths. Again, I'm no stranger to having medicine in the form of food. I've just never focused on food with the sole reason to loose weight. That was a very new personal reason for me.

My Tips

Find Your Cheerleaders

Make Small Changes

Mindful Eating

Give Yourself a Reasonable Goal

Stay Motivated


Phase 1: Small Mindful Changes*

Creating a Foundation for Growth and Sustainability

First 21 days**- 2months

Reseting metabolism


At the start it's really about laying the groundwork, eating through the stuff you know you can't have for awhile while you are getting into a groove (waste not), finding the weak spots, making adjustments and looking for support. I was hopeful this was what a successful setup looked like:

  1. I found three friends that I felt safe talking about this with and they became my cheerleaders. Two bffs that I can share anything with and I recruited my Pilates student turned coach.

  2. Started looking at sugars/carbs in foods to help make purchasing choices.

  3. Immediately was more mindful of my snacking habits with the girls. Those little snack monsters. We weren't eating anything that high in carbs, but the frequency was catching up in my body I suspected.

  4. Rededicated to Vitamin D, Omegas, and Green and CCF Teas

  5. Rededicated to water intake

  6. Food and Workout Journal (1)

  7. Bought a Wyze Scale - For the record this is my first ever purchased scale. Weighed myself every Tuesday in the morning.

  8. Created a workout schedule that include 2 private Pilates sessions, 1-2 runs a week, and more. Time to step things up a notch. (2)

  9. I gave myself a year to loss 15-20lbs. Goal weight 130-135lbs.

  10. I opened up this blog draft to share, to hope, to inspire, to record, to have faith in myself. It comes from the heart. My clients that have shared their own vulnerabilities with me about their weight, and health are my inspiration.


Phase 2:Getting in the Groove and Managing Holidays/Celebrations

I did all of the above the first two months and was feeling like I was getting somewhere slowly. I lost only 2 lbs, dropped a pant size, clothes were fitting better, I was feeling more attractive but there's so much ground to make! Frankly, I was so mad at my old way of thinking. I kept shaking my fist at what my friends would say as 90s propaganda. I felt wronged. So then I would be bummed I only lost x amount but thank goodness, I am the Little Engine That Could. I had a big weight loss goal to chip away at and by God I am going to do it.


This period of time hit a challenging season, the beginning of the holiday season with up first, candy filled Halloween. Halloween thru New Years is a mine field of indulgences. I love sugar. If the sugar season wasn't enough, the weather turned bad. Rain, wind, darkness, illnesses, bye bye school and nap walks.....How to make up for lost steps inside? How to make up for workouts missed?


  1. Make backup plans for movement especially with rainy days or life hits hard.

  2. Lean into Accountability Partners or Support Squad. It may only be a person or two. And, that's okay. I feel much safer when I can truly count on my cheerleaders.

  3. I added focus on doing something for my soul everyday especially if I didn't get the movement I craved in.

  4. Began Playing with Apple Cider vinegar when I have a sugary meal.



Phase 3: Set Backs


The beginning of November brought stress (hello, comfort meals) and anniversary (yay. for love) and instant two pound gain. I was spiraling. WTF. Two months, 5 lbs, and two meals out I'm up 2 pounds. Ahhhhh!!!! BUT, I took a breath, had faith in the process, reminded myself I reset my metabolism lets see what happens that following week. How much is "water weight" or bloat or whatever (I'm not a nutritionist or dietitian). But, guess what?? The unexpected happened: I suddenly was down almost 3 pounds! "It's working, it's working"I cheered in my head.


During this month I received some interesting perspective, or advise, or guidance, whatever you want to call it from one of my besties. She received it thru a friend. She is also using the scale as a check in, so if you notice you are up, you know you need to scale back, make adjustments, make more mindful choices, and then measure again in a week. It keeps her friend on track. This idea really inspired and empowered me, especially with the kick of the start of the holiday season looming.



Part Three: No Magic Pill

Winter (December thru Feb)

My Tips

Keep the faith

The scale can be my friend

Go with the flow

Celebrate wins


These months flew by in a weird way. December, I was on dance mom mode, and focused on the holidays, and winter break. January I didn't feel too off on my scale reads. I was steady, and I lost 2-3 more lbs by the middle of February. I was feeling like I was hitting a stride or a groove in this goal and focus. I stayed on track with my twice a week Pilates sessions, and tried to walk when the weather allowed. By the end of February I was ready for Spring and the seasons activities. I made it through the winter! I was down a pant size! Time to step it up another notch! 5 to 10 more pounds to go! Maybe I can do this.


Part Four: Dance in the Rain

Spring (March thru May)


My Tips

Adding spice like going to new studio

Connecting with your cheerleaders and celebrating

Turbo charge your practice

Ayurveda Recipes

You got this


Thank you, Spring! Is Spring my new fav????? I've always been in love with fall but spring is bringing me playful vibes this year! I've heard of people saying spring can have playful, energetic vibes but never really bought into it that much until this year. Maybe I'm moving out of the fog of postpartum more, the girls are blooming and thriving, I feel lighter... I'm ready to enjoy bees, butterflies and bunnies with them!


I noticed due to our birthday season in our family I fluctuated a bit on the scale. The scale was so helpful to see when I needed to clean up a week which ultimately kept me at a plateau. Once I equalized a bit, the turbo charged workouts and leaning into Ayurveda helped me get back at notching away to the finish line ahead for September. Also, it is setting up the summer season for success!


When I indulge I have found these add ins effective:

  • water

  • apple cider vinegar (I teaspoon in water)

  • eat less - being mindful of how much I've been eating (like going out to eat)

  • Making sure I walk

  • Mindful of the carbs

  • Gotta watch myself over just one chocolate

  • Scheduling movement

  • resting when life stays so (stress)

  • being mindful


Other changes with the season:

  • gardens and nature - using the season to get outside more! Better for me soul, body, and mentally.

  • return to running and vinyasa - turbo charging my movement for tone and weight loss. Also, to help ease guilt in enjoying the O'Dea birthday season!

  • Ayurveda recipes to help bring balance and shed off a few more pounds especially with stress present.


Part Five:

Summer (June thru August)

I Slowed Down


I think looking back, I gave myself a break. I don't feel like I overindulged too much and I went with the flow - which is not l really my strong suits. My focus was being present with my girls. Maybe I should have carved out some more me time in but I enjuoyed every bit of my summer. I had amazing Pilates Playdates with two awesome souls. I felt lighter though. I was having fun with outfits, my blond balayage again, I enjoyed showing off my strong abs in class, and being truely happy. I have a few selfies I took during the summer months and I feel and look good!


Below my Pilates Playdates



Part Six: A Full Year

Results

  • I am more aware of cycles in nature, cycles in our bodies, cycles in routine with the return to school and ballet season, return to self, the season of ever changing change.

  • My journey is still continuing and I am proud of myself and my body. I end the 12 months at my goal of 10 lb sustained loss. And, getting that 3-5lb loss is on the horizon with the focus I had in the beginning. The journey continues though to make it to my ideal weight. And, I have to say I'm way more hopeful about than I was a year ago.

  • I'm feeling really healthy, hopeful, and happy. Things are looking up for 1st grade so maybe the stress from kindergarden won't be an obstacle to shed more pounds this year. I am a major beleiver that stress impacts health in major ways.

  • Stay tuned for updates on this blog post as the years tick by.

  • Notes on Pictures below: Well, one big change from September 2023 and 2024, is I'm in more pictures! That tells ya something! :) Meanwhile, look at how tall Charlotte is!!!




Start

End

Net

160

150

10

pant size 10

4/6

2-3 pant sizes!!

dress size 10

8

1

M/L

All over the map! L-for crop tops, M-at Target and Nordstroms S-at Costco

Talk about mixed messages

150

140

2025 goal



2024 Summer Selfies


Summary

Healthy looks different on everyone. Run your own race. I beleive if we tell our experiences with eachother people will understand more experiences, differences, and similarities with one another. Social media has done a good enough job placing images with weight loss. A ten pound weight loss may look huge in one person and different in the next. I do think our society needs major help navigating how to talk about weight loss and appreciate beauty in a geniune way. Weight loss is hard. I do think it should be celebarted - the WORK not the loss.The HEALTH benefits and CONFIDENCE. Or, however that person wants to be acknowledged or not. And, please never, ever ask someone if they are pregnant.


TOOLS

  • Support Squad - Supportive cheerleaders - What would help you keeping moving forward even when set backs occur?

  • water

  • vitamins - Vitamin D and Omegas

  • doctor - if weight loss isn't happening talk to a doc and get blood work ordered

  • Befriend your scale

  • Yoga for the mind

  • Pilates for your body

  • walking for health span longevitity and being outdoors in Nature

  • Sustainable lifestyle vs diet

  • Yummy cookbooks - may need education on choices (3)

  • Journal - write down emotions, quality of life, changes, pain, what you are grateful for, what is going well in your life, what do you cherish, what are your whys , etc befriend yourself.

  • Be present



I got this. You do too.



Footnotes

*Full Transparency Moment: I limit gluten, I limit coffee to 2 cups a day, and I have like one alcoholic beverage a week.

**Loads of thought, research, mindsets, that it take 21 days to form good, healthy habits. I'll let you google that. ;)


(1) There is contradictory thoughts on this. It could form toxic feelings over food. Be mindful. Reach out to professionals. I do this because I'm a type A personality, I love to organize and it works for me to jumpstart focus.



Seasonal Workout Schedules

Each season has its vibe, weather, and inspiration


Fall

(2) Here's what the weekly schedule looked like for me:

Sunday - Private Pilates session

Monday - self care - rest or yoga or Pilates 45 min

Tuesday - run

Wednesday - Private Pilates session

Thursday - yoga, or Pilates 45min

Friday - rest or yoga or Pilates 45min

Saturday - run

+ walking Monday - Friday


Winter

Sunday - Private Pilates session

Monday - self care - rest

Tuesday - Private Pilates session

Wednesday - walk

Thursday - rest

Friday - 10 min yoga

+walking when weather allows - reminder I do have a 20-23 month old to manage on top of movement and nourishment.


(December note: so many family, ballet, winter break, seemingly endless flu/colds broke up the flow of a normal week. That's when logging activity, food, scale measurements, leaning into balance, and love work for me and my body.)


Spring

Sunday - Yoga

Monday - self care - rest

Tuesday - walk/run & Mat Pilates

Wednesday - walk & swim

Thursday - 45min of yoga or Pilates

Friday - 30min of yoga or Pilates

Saturday - yoga, walk, or run, dance mom mode


Summer

Keeping up with the girls - being outside


Fall Recharge - 1 year - Keeping it Simple

Sunday - Pilates

Monday - rest Tuesday - Mat Pilates

Wednesday - walking

Thursdays - Pilates

Friday - walking

Saturday- Pilates


Another reminder I have a 2yr old at home while oldest at school so my workout schedule continues to ebb and flow with her which is why I hire a babysitter once a week so I can get it in. Preschool will allow more room for longer workouts and more of them. For me, its a balance of movement and being present to young children. They aren't tiny or little for long.


(3) Some of my favorite cookbook authors in no particular order because kids are running around behind me:

Ina Garten

Gwyneth Paltrow

Giada De Laurentiis Kate O'Donnell

My Pinterest Board is accessable on my homepage of www.emilyodea.com which has many food boards


Stuff and Resources

Movement Defined: In my body and practice I define movement as Pilates, yoga, running, walking, hiking, dance parties, running with the kids, gardening. Movement that makes your soul and spine sing may be different. I can also take this to the next level and also have these as "mindful movements" which is when you are so present to that moment. You put down your phone, silence the noise, and really be. Be with the breath, body, emotions, connections, one. (wink, wink, it's what Yoga is all about.)


Resources

  1. Newsweek: Should We End Obesity? The weight-loss drug explosion has forced a reconsideration of what 'healthy' means.

  2. The Health Sheet Library from Health at Every Size

  3. "Glucose Revolution" by Jessie Inchauspe - her website

  4. Oatmeal Benefits - "I tried Princess Kate's oatmeal breakfast routine - and the results surprised me" from HELLO!

  5. Your Body Ages Rapidly in two 'bursts' by National Geographic



May I be healthy

May I be calm May I be safe

May I be happy



Special thanks to all of you who have included me on your health journeys. You all are so strong, special, generous and inspirational. I am so grateful to learn from you.


I cannot express the gratitude I have have for movement modalitites like yoga and Pilates that forms these bonds and connections.


Cheers to the next 15 years of Yoga and Pilates

Thank you.



Pictured Upper Row: 2014 in LA/Pilates instructor, 2013 at Kirkland waterfront/yoga Instructor, 2017 pregnant with Charlotte

Pictured Lower Row: 2020 home space is born, 2021 pregnant with Lily at Dash Pt. waterfront and my little mover Lily

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